I don't know whether to be happy or sad.
I had the most lovely Saturday afternoon, evening and Sunday morning with the ex. I'm a bit fed up of writing "the ex", "the ex boyf", "my ex fiance" etc... so from now on I'll call him Moose. This is partially because he's as hairy as a moose, but mostly because it would help if I could give him a name on here.
Anyway he turned up Saturday afternoon. I was originally a little peeved as he was supposed to be coming over in the morning but when he called to apologise that he hadn't turned up because he'd fallen back asleep, I couldn't be angry, just glad he'd finally had a couple of hours of sleep.
Without going into too much soppy detail he was so affectionate. For the last couple of months he's only held my hand when I've reached out for it, he's only snuggled when I've snuggled up to him and he's put up with me giving him kisses. Not this weekend. He seemed genuinely pleased to be spending time with me. It was so nice to get given kisses just because and to have him cuddling me in front of the TV.
We woke up in the morning and had another cuddle and then his phone rang. It was his sister telling him that their Dad was on the way to give them their birthday presents. He thought his Dad would be visiting next week so had to leave early. Part of me was upset because it meant we were spending less time together, but the other part of me was just so pleased we had a lovely time together that I didn't mind at all. Next weekend is his actual birthday weekend and he has plans to go to a car show with his best friend so I won't be seeing him for a fortnight. It seems like ages but I'm sure with all the work I've got it'll fly by. I just need to quiet the doom-merchant in my mind that's telling me that it can't last.
It also gives me something to really look forward to. That weekend is the weekend between mine and his birthday. Because of this we're going to do something special as a treat. Even though he's afraid of heights he wants to go on the London Eye. I'm going to book a special Pimms flight on the London Eye, so we can enjoy the best summer drink while looking over the city. Lovely. I'm sooo excited!
In the meanwhile I have so much work to do I should probably get on with it.
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